Hearing < Listening

I am the worst at hearing. By this I mean if you're in a room of ten people I won't be able to hear from you. If I'm trying to multi-task I won't be able to hear you. Mumble pffff nope.

The TV is full blast, my music is the same. This is not because I want to blast my eardrums with sweet sweet music no. It's because otherwise, everything sounds as if it's got a huge blanket smothering it.

I knew it was strange when I started a job where I was on the phones and I couldn't hear the people on the phone. My favourite repeated phase is 'pardon', 'Sorry what did you say?' or 'Can you repeat that please'. It gets to the point when I'm getting irritated with myself but, take it out on the person I cant hear ' I can't hear a word your saying can you please talk louder!'.

Everyone thinks I'm just ditsy which is probably right but I wanted to find out for real what is going on.

So I went to the get my ears checked and apart from thick ear wax everything is fine. I got into a deep conversation with the lady who was checking my ears as I was frustrated that I still didn't know why I was not hearing very well. The conversation went in the direction of talking about my dyslexia and how this can affect different abilities. Finding this out has made me feel a bit more 'ohhhh that makes sense' but, I'm still an awful listener and everything is still at full blast.

However, the very funny and odd thing is I'm a really good listener (not to blow my own trumpet).
If it's me and you. I can sit and listen and take everything in. I forget everything that's happening with me and listen to everything you say. My advice is probably not the best but I do mean the very best for you.

I guess lacking good hearing is a lack of care for myself but a good listen is an over care for someone else.

Arent us humans just strange complicated beings but come on ears why can't you work all the time!